Self destructive tendencies align

So, what better way to cope with hating your current situation but having to act like everything is fine all of the time than drinking absurd amounts of alcohol, if there's a better way I have not heard about it yet. But yeah I spoke about it all last time and reading back I don't think I should expand on the already big subject. At least having money does kind of make up a bit for all the loathing.

Plus at the rate I'm acting I'm gonna need that money to pay to fix my liver, lol. Hey at least I have kept my sense of humor, and at least all this darkness is going to be useful as a reference for future chapters of my book, and I'm sure revisiting this time of my life will come in handy whenever I have to portray something similar, to be honest it's not something a lot of people can actually describe that well, so I guess in sort of a weird and ironically morbid way I can be considered lucky? The jury is still out on that one but I guess time will tell how the story goes, since there hasn't been a time machine invented yet and hence time is still strictly linear. It's a shame really.

You know, some people don't know what could possibly drive someone to actually put a shotgun to their mouths and pull the trigger, it's someone no one talks about, it's stupid. It happens, everyone has different points of view and well, to some preserving life no matter how miserable the being is isn't good. I guess you can tell in which side of the assisted suicide I'm in.

I guess that's why when in House he tells thirteen that when the time comes he'll kill her it's such a nice moment. I don't think people understand that, society in general is well known for not understanding misery. Perhaps if more of our leaders spent hardships in life they would be better rulers, I sure as hell know that you can't understand something unless you go through it.

It's actually pretty fucking stupid that people want their rulers to be someone that has never really had to deal with a personal problem. It surely is a good way to elect someone that won't know your necessities and that will most likely screw the fuck up. But humankind has never really been known for being that smart, or smart at all actually.

Life isn't fair, people are douches and happiness includes a really big and sometimes unbearable amount of suffering. So yeah, and people wonder why atheists exist, I'm agnostic though, I just think that God is a joker and not really benevolent at all, whenever anyone tells me about God's love and blah blah I just remind them of all the smitten characters in the old testament, or the unbelievably asshole-ish trials they had to endure, killing your own son? Really, God? I know he was all like, lolIwaskidding right before he actually did it, but it's still a really tasteless prank if you ask me.

So, summing it up, God's a jerk, people are stupid and naive, politicians are spoiled brats that haven't had an honest day of work in their entire lives and pain and suffering make for a good source for music, books and movies. Yep, that's my point of view as of today, and I doubt it will change anytime soon.